Saturday, May 9, 2009

How to sidestep 5 big diet blunders


Fattening flub: eating a variety of foods
Why it doesn't work: We're hardwired to eat more when faced with a number of different choices. This mechanism gives us a slimming advantage when a spread consists of low-cal, filling fare such as veggies and lean protein. But unless you pass by the snack aisle and plant your cart by the produce bins, chances are your fridge is filled with variety of a different sort.
What does work: It's OK to have a few treats in the house, but limit your stash to one or two types—the rest of your shelf space should be reserved for a range of nutritious foods.


Fattening flub: never going for seconds
Why it doesn't work: If we're held to a single serving, we want to make it count. It's human nature—get your fill while you can. The problem is, if you load up your plate with a heaping pile of food, chances are you'll eat it all, says Madelyn Fernstrom, Ph.D., director of the Weight Management Center at the University of Pittsburgh Medical Center. Knowing you can go back for another helping if need be encourages you to put less on your plate the first time around and allows your body to register fullness before the second helping.
What does work: Begin retraining yourself to start off with at least 20 percent less than you're used to eating. Then after 20 minutes—the time it takes for us to start to feel full—gauge your hunger. Still have an appetite? Dig in again, but keep it reasonably portioned.

Fattening flub: using exercise as an excuse to eat more
Why it doesn't work: Unfortunately, exercise does not burn as many calories as we might think. Thirty minutes on the elliptical, for example, cancels out only one Reese's Peanut Butter Cup, says Ann Yelmokas McDermott, Ph.D., director of the Center for Obesity Prevention and Education at California Polytechnic State University in San Luis Obispo. If you're training for a sporting event, you may need to eat more to fuel your workouts—otherwise, consider regular exercise a keep-it-in-check tool, not a free pass to bulldoze your way through the mall food court.
What does work: Exercise—but not for the reasons you'd imagine. While cardio won't completely burn away a weekend binge, it does benefit health by increasing energy and lowering risk for heart disease. Another perk of busting a move? "Good behavior often begets other good behaviors," McDermott explains. Working out may make you feel good, so you eat better.

Fattening flub: hanging a tiny cocktail dress on the closet door for motivation
Why it doesn't work: You may think the hopeful purchase of a little black dress or photos of thin models will encourage you to lose, but you'd be wrong. "Some women feel worse about themselves after seeing skinny models in ads. And if you feel bad about yourself, it's harder to stick to an eating and exercise plan," says Kathleen Martin Ginis, Ph.D., professor of health and exercise psychology at McMaster University in Hamilton, Ontario.
What does work: Focus on accomplishments, not shortcomings. "When you notice you're comparing your body to the girl next to you at the track, stop. Instead, think, I can run for five more minutes than I could a month ago," Martin Ginis says. And don't fixate on the end goal, such as the 20-pound loss. "Plan short-term goals, like 'I'm going to the gym three times this week, or I'm cooking a healthy dinner tomorrow,'" she suggests.

Fattening flub: thinking fruit and veggies are "free foods," so you can eat all you want
Why it doesn't work:
Produce is a must, but if you favor high-sugar, high-calorie dried fruit, fruit juice and starchy veggies, beware. "Peas, corn and potatoes are higher in calories than other high-water-content vegetables such as cucumbers and green beans," says Keri Gans, R.D., a spokeswoman in New York City for the American Dietetic Association. Plus, you need three to five servings of veggies each day and only two to four servings of fruit. "A piece of fresh fruit has 60 calories, and a serving of most vegetables has about 25," Gans says.
What does work: Pick water-rich veggies such as zucchini and spinach and high-fiber fruit such as apples and berries. And replace fatty sauces and dressings with low-cal ones such as salsa, fat-free ranch dressing and spritzes of lemon and lime. Then munch your way to your goal weight!

Thursday, May 7, 2009

9 essentials Tips for Single Women


#1: The Third-Date Outfit
The first date's a formality. The second establishes mutual attraction. And the third date is all about turning up the heat. So whether it's those saucy black boots you splurged on at Bloomies, or that curve-hugging skirt, or even that sensual spaghetti-strap top, a single girl's gotta have something that makes her feel like a million bucks for that rare but fabulous third date.

#2: Girlfriends
We make each other laugh, soothe each other through sadness, and stick together even through the toughest breakups, makeups, and in-between times. Gotta have our girlfriends!

#3: Self-Confidence
Singles should always follow this simple but effective mantra: Always look like you know what you're doing and that you're having fun doing it!
Single men love confident women and will follow you all the way from the produce department to frozen foods just to find a way to say hi! When they do, smile confidently and say hi back.

#4: A Passport
After a big breakup, I decided to take my dream Mediterranean vacation. Somewhere between exploring ancient ruins and hiking a 12-mile gorge with a cute Air Force officer, I realized my ex would have hated this trip, which made me appreciate my experience all the more. And whenever I look at my passport, I smile at the fond memories of my singlehood adventure.

#5: The Perfect Workout
Working out is no longer about logging that hour of cardio on the treadmill. It's about finding what works best for you. So get out of that gym and have some fun! Whether it's hiking, biking, Pilates, yoga, or some combination thereof, hop to it!

#6: A Financial Planner
Most of our mothers went from their father's house to the sorority house to their husband's house. Not today's single gal. Most of us make enough money to live alone, give to charity, and still go on that amazing weekend getaway with the girls. But after awhile, it's time to get smart. Start planning for the future. And that's where a financial advisor comes in. Even in these troubled times, investing in the future is a safe bet.

#7: A Sense of Adventure
As we get older and our responsibilities grow, we often find ourselves feeling saddled with commitments like mortgage payments, family obligations, job duties. But a single gal must never lose her sense of adventure. Whether that means jumping out of a plane, buying that fire-engine red dress, or flying to Vegas for an impromptu weekend of decadence, go for it!

#8: A Hair Stylist
Most women put a lot of stock -- and product -- in our hair. And if we're not happy, it affects how we present ourselves to the world. So if you haven't already, splurge a little and find the perfect stylist to meet your needs. You won't regret it!

#9: The Right Technology
I used to live with a boyfriend who had a surround-sound system. When we broke up, I held off on buying a new TV, speakers, or any other electronic devices for a long time. My logic was: The next boyfriend will have all that. After several short-term relationships involving tech-savvy men and their toys, I eventually invested in my own system. Whether it's a home theater system, a decent computer, or just an iPod with your fave tunes, it's time to take stock of what you may be waiting for a mate to provide. And immediately provide it for yourself.

Sunday, May 3, 2009

First-Date Red Flags

dating couple happily hugging
Dating Lie #1: "I'm between jobs."
Don't let a line like this get lost in translation. When a dude feeds you this one, what he's really trying to say is "I have no friggin' clue what I want to do with my life." Nicholas, 29,* comes clean: "A few years ago, I was collecting unemployment and crashing on friends' couches," he says. "I had zero direction, but it wasn't like I could confess that to a girl without her thinking I was a total loser. Saying I was between jobs was the best way to sugarcoat my situation." Warning: This guy's mom still does his laundry, and there's a good chance you're springing for dinner.
Don't assume he'll work things out, because when he does, you may realize his ambitions don't mesh with yours. "This mistake has contributed to the starter-marriage phenomenon, in which couples in their 20s and 30s suddenly realize they're going in different directions and divorce at an early age," says Dobransky. "It's preventable as long as you're both clear about your plans."

Dating Lie #2: "I never move this fast on the first date."
Yeah, right! Truth be told: He can't believe you're letting him move that fast. "It's the woman who dictates how far things go," says Anthony, 23. "I'm always up for action, but I'll play the prude card just so my date doesn't think I'm a player." Bottom line: If you give a guy the opportunity, he's going to take it.

Dating Lie #3: "I've never had a serious girlfriend."
Sure, it's possible that he's never had a bona fide better half, but chances are, there's an ulterior motive here. It could be a sly way of admitting he can't commit. "When I was in my early 20s, I was only interested in hooking up," says Matt, 31. "Even though I had a long-term girlfriend in high school, I always downplayed my commitment capacity so girls wouldn't get attached." On the brighter side, he might be trying to pique your interest with a covert challenge. Don't you want to be the one girl a guy can't resist falling for?

Dating Lie #4: "I'll call you."
This one might sting a little, but Barry, 25, is willing to take the fall. "The last time I said 'I'll call you' to a girl was after I'd had the worst date of my life," he admits. "I felt obligated to say something just to be polite, but I 'lost' her number the second I walked out the door." Ouch! But there is some good news. There's a sneaky way to tell if he's a dubious dialer: A specific "I'll call you Friday" or "I'll call you tomorrow after work" almost guarantees he'll make good on the promise.

TMI Factor: When She Was Too Honest
"On a first date, this girl blurted out that she gets bored easily and never keeps a guy around long. She should've stamped player on her forehead." - Terence
"I had only known a girl for a few days when she hit me with 'I need you to meet my parents, because if my dad doesn't like you, we're done.'" - Omar
"I went on a blind date with a woman who knew my brother, and the first thing she said was 'Your brother is so fine... You guys look nothing alike.'" - Don
*Names have been changed.

Are you a Snob? 10 Ways to Tell If You're a Snob

Are you a bit discerning or too hoity-toity for your own good? Do you simply have an excellent sense of style or are you a bona fide snob? Here are ten ways to tell, because most people don't think it's them. If more than one or two sound familiar, open your mind because you've just qualified as an S-N-O-B...

The Name Game You name-drop -- from the pricey bottle of "Dom" you downed last night to how ultra-comfy your new "Gucci" loafers are.

Kennedy-itis You hide the truth about your humble family background. Instead of proudly talking about dad's career as a plumber, you refer to him as an "engineer."

Auto-Phobia When your date shows up in a non-luxury ride (something other than a BMW, Mercedes, or Porsche), you feel the urge to feign illness because you'd rather take an ambulance than get in a "junker."

Shopping Secrets You only shop discount stores at a computer in the privacy of your home because the thought of being spotted with a cart full of goods at K-Mart makes you shudder.

Bling Bias When it comes to engagement rings, smaller stones make you feel bad for the bride.
Food Fears When someone suggests a restaurant where you serve yourself, you laugh. So, any eating that requires waiting in line, especially fast food, is out of the question.

Label Mania Even when it comes to plain old basic white t-shirts, the ones by trusty brands such as Hanes and Fruit of the Loom are out of the question. You need designer names on everything from you socks to your undies.

Gift Gripes When friends give you gifts, you think right away about how much it cost. Maybe you even believe the quality of the relationship is equivalent to the price of the goody. The more expensive the item, the closer you feel to your friend.

Supermarket Snubbing When you see a man tossing Pop-Tarts into his basket at the market, you get the urge to read him the list of unhealthy ingredients. You judge people in the checkout line by the number of frozen entrees and salty snacks they're buying.
Pet Peeves Your "babies" are costly purebreds that you dress like four-pawed princes and princesses. And you judge other pet-owners who don't serve their animals organic dinner off real china.